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Monday, January 26, 2009 (10:52 PM)

feel so emo
like out of the blue
maybe its menopause? HAHAH as if..

its the age
its getting to me
well i know 19 is considered young but it is bothering me becasue! throughout my 19 years i have never enjoyed my life the way a teenage should.
like going out, having fun, going wild HAVING LIFE

teenagehood and childhood has just been about studies and becasue of the strict parents
i rarely go out ok not rarely but in between rarely and seldom
ask them this
NO
ask them that
NO
answer is mostly no
I NEED A LIFE

and bloody poly is taking up even more of my time! everyday project this project that kns la
and by the time i grad
i will be 20! A 2 IS REPLACING MY BELOVED 1! that is when
i will become a semi adult!!!
like so scary!! then if i ever go to uni i will grad at the age of 24 and then work and get married at 26 AND that is where i will officially have no life.
i see my cousins getting married and of course have their child blablabla what a blessing blablabla
but your life will just be about your children and working blablabla
i wanted to go achieve my dream when i was still a teenager!
but i guess impossible now?
feeeel so ollld!!!!!!!! maybe another reason is also because i am no longer the youngest generation of the family and i have more and more nieces and nephews popping out! calling me aunty rachel! like wtf! i am only 19! call mi jie jie! LOl

and i guess at this age, pple will start talking to u about weddings!!!!!!!!!!
well maybe it only happens to me?

was chatting to a very very very close friend of mine the other day, it was the first time we chatted in 2 years and haveknown each other for 7 years since i was in sec 1!
and then i was asking him about army and how was his gf blabla
and now he has changed from lawyer gf to executive gf

his gf is 3 years older than him but its ok la since he prefers mature girls
and anyways he told me that his gf BROKE UP WITH HER FIANCE for hiM!
like
wow
so cool
the power of love! XD

then he told me that they were gonna get married when he hits 25 cause otherwise she will be too old and all.
then i was like HUH
then it suddenly felt like it was just days ago when we would call each other everyday to chat and he will listen to all my complaints and let me cry over the phone blabla
and i would listen to him talking about his gfs and give him comments
i mean it is so sudden
although it is just getting married but it somehow feels different!
its like we practically watched each other grow up. from childish to being mature
and then he is gonna be a dad and..
duno how to explain but it just feels kinda sad
we used to chat so much and that day he seemed kinda stranger
it was heartbreaking

these few days have been such emo days
must be the projects
sigh..




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